Chuck

post #410

Work's been overwhelming lately...no more lite browsing during office hour...heck even no more more browsing after office hour. I was really drowned in work. Went home at almost midnite these last few days. All for the preparation of Go Live on 1st June.

Luckily...I had the long weekend to recharge. Some of my colleagues weren't as fortunate as they had to come to Bogor to have a briefing, which lasted for 8 hours....Well...it couldn't be called briefing...8 hours is not brief :D

Anyway...lot of things happened lately...but the main reason I write this entry is because I just managed to watch Chuck again after..... a year and a half (I think)...the last episode that I watch was Christmas episode of 2008....and now...I got the the rest of season 2 and 3...yippieee....Gosh....it surprised me that I hadn't watched in such a long time. I used to get weekly supply from MS, but after she moved to KL, my supply was stopped.

Anyway...Yvonne was still pretty....Chuck was still funny...and...in season 3, there's a new addition to the team. To my surprise, it was Brandon Routh...the (fail, if I may say so) Superman in Superman Returns. And to make me even more excited, Kristin Kreuk appeared as well from episode 5.

Wowwww....how long has it been? Since the first time I laid my eyes on her in Smallville. It was 2001. Nine years have passed, yet she still looked dazzling. She's not a teenage girl anymore. I don't even really follow news about her since Smallville season.....5 (I think). The last movie of her that I watched was Chun Li (not so good).

Looking her in Chuck gave me that breeze....reminded me of the times when I was such a fan of her. It made me realize that I missed her. I missed her eyes, her smile, her voice, her laughter....I miss those days...my univ days...days when I wouldn't miss Smallville episode....

I miss you, Kristin Laura Kreuk

Crushed

post #408

And I was crushed....

David Archuleta - Crush

I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush

'Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It's just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?
Is there more, is there more?

See it's a chance we've gotta take
'Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last
Last forever, forever

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
This crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

You Light My Fire

post #380

Whoaaaa....I spent the whole month without writing here.
The main reason was that I think somehow my passion to write was in its lowest point....I'd rather drown myself at work (work had been quite busy with new responsibilities I had to take) and watch TV serials as entertainment. There were some some ideas floating around in my head, but I never really got the motivation to write them down.

But today I was swept away by a powerful tide after a friend gave me a link to her friend's blog. It's so out of the blue that I was chatting with her....we're catching up since she's gonna resign soon. In the middle of conversation (which I wouldn't elaborate), she gave me her friend's blog.

I was intrigued. I dunno but I find reading people's blog is interesting thing to do. I can learn...a lot sometimes....the blogs broaden my perspective, enrich my knowledge, and some give me a good laugh. Not to mention that my friend, soon to be ex-colleague said good words about her friend's blog.

I quickly browsed her friend's blog and found that it is good. The perspective it offered caught my attention. Moreover this blog was written by such a young girl. I was impressed that at that age she already had way more mature way of thinking, how a person perceive things in life....compared to the other girls (spare the boys) at her age. I don't think that I was that mature at the same age...even if I were, I'd be not that confident to speak up my mind (well perhaps the fact that blogging wasn't even existed back then could be one of the reasons I couldn't properly channel my thoughts)

Again this proved that maturity doesn't necessarily come with age. I read two-three entries of her blog and it intrigued me more and more. I'm gonna explore her blog more later. Reading her blog gave me the chill...and then the fire inside my heart....the one which was fading away...the passion to write....was lit up again. I felt this urge to write right there and then....and being in the middle of working hours didn't really help. I had to restrain myself, control my urge....and now... I'm letting it all out....all out...

I guess this is all also showed that we all are bound with phases...with cycle....just like a saying that life is like a wheel, one time you're up...the other you're down...my passion to write (among other things I believe) also had its cycle...there were times when I was so passionate to write....there were times when I was very lazy to even copy paste a song lyric :D

I think its normal...its human. The difference is whether we keep on going or not. Just like when we already decide something....there will be ups and downs as the consequences of the decision...but we should keep going on....what happen if we stop? For sure, we wouldn't be moving anywhere...

I'm gonna write some more...with this newly rejuvenated passion.....
I'd like to dedicate this entry especially for J.B.
Thank you...you light my fire (again)....

Last Day @Wave 3

post #365

Whoaaaa.....today marked the last day in this project. It's been a great run...I should say that I'm thankful to be part of this project, meeting new people from various countries, learning new things, and executing new responsibilities....It's been a rewarding experience.

Just got back from afternoon coffee session @Starbucks. Already sent notification email to the on-site team about my roll-off and their response were positive. One of them even said that I'm a great ABAPer...... *blushing...hehhehehe

Life goes on....last Wednesday I had my last futsal game in FY2009...it was good game. There were about sixteen people came. I managed to scored 12 goals, a hattrick in a match....after that we took some pictures....I hope there would be more of this...To channel all that energy and passion....

Work's been slowing down at the beginnig of the week, but piling up these last two days...but still managable....

Sunday would be Eddy's wedding. I need to prepare (and groom) myself to be a good best man. Arrggghhhh...so many things swimming in my head at the moment but I just can't seem to pour them all out....I'm overwhelmed with emotions and this brain + fingers cannot really translate them all...Hence this rather incoherent babbling....

I just got an IM from one of the functional...

hi xxxxx...it's been my great pleasure to work with u as well
you are one of the best abapers i have met.. and i have learnt lots
thanks!!!

*Blushing again....Wow...it seemed like I have been underestimating my own skills....Thank God; All the project assignments must have forged me to accomplish these acknowledgment. I still need to keep sharpening myself....improving...

*Sighh.....everything went well.
Like Matrix Revolution tag line...everything that has a beginning, has an end....
And I think I have ended this one superbly....:D

Gonna finish Chuck season 2 tonight and enjoy the weekend ahead....
Thank You, God....help me in my next project....

ad majorem Dei gloriam

Darkness

post #360

Hold on to love...
Change will come...



Darren Hayes - Darkness

Been spending so much time underground
I guess my eyes adjusted
To the lack of light
I got
Covered in darkness
Covered in darkness

Hibernating always waiting for something new
Happiness always ending
In the blink of an eye
There was no one attending
No one attending

It doesn't really matter where it all began
All I know
I got covered in darkness
Covered in darkness
Ever wonder why I never really truly connect
Although my eyes are open
I can hold your gaze
But I am never connected
Never connected

I am famous for my generosity
They say I am the kindest
But it is easier to
Give than receive love
Give than receive love

It doesn't really matter where it all began
All I know
I was covered in darkness
Covered in darkness

Turning pages over
Run away to nowhere
And it's hard to take control
When your enemy's old and afraid of you
You'll discover that the monster you were running from
Is the monster in you

Better to hold on to love
Better to hold on to love
Change will come

It doesn't really matter where it all began
All I know
I was covered in darkness
Covered in darkness

It doesn't really matter where it all began
Cuz all I know
I was lost
I was lost
No, no

It doesn't really matter where it all began no no
All I know
I was lost
I feel lost
Lost
No...

This Moment

post #296

I'm used to smile calmly, though my heart is crying
That's the one thing we need to be an adult, the ability to conceal our true feelings, our emotions. We had to consider appropriate time to show them and whom we show them to....Unlike children who are more honest and sincere about their feelings. They can smile, laugh, cry, mad, sad whenever they feel that way. While adults were expected to behave, not only act according to their emotions/feelings. Would this make us, the adults, not being honest? Or would it be simply a self control?

Why would we need to do this? Cause not all the time act based merely on emotions was a good things to do, a wise and the right one. Sometimes it's better to hold back, suppress the emotions and wait for the time to express it. Well, if the feelings was still relevant to be shown or expressed. Feelings changed, it fluctuated as time went by...it could be fast, it could be slow. If the feelings were no longer relevant then it's no longer necessary to express it, or maybe the feelings already changed....though feelings might be the same, but actions could differ due to circumstances...different moments, different feelings, different actions....

Reminded me of Eli Stone seas 1 ep 10.
Maggie Decker : We had a moment. But it's over. The moment had passed.

Just like what Clark Kent said in Smallville seas 1, episode 19 - Crush.
Clark Kent : I let the moment passed and I don't think I'll ever get it back.

There were times when it's necessary to go with the flow, to seize the moment before it passed. To follow the impulse...to really live the moment....Wisdom was surely needed to decide when to act based emotions, and when not to...This moment, I really love this song...

You are the story, written with certainty
Forever in my mind

Hold me for a while
And let us fade away certainly
Let everything the way it is
Never will be mine

Forget all, leave this
I'll be calm and you'll be gone

Keep walking though there's no more light
Take the light of my love
Let it shine your path
Among thousands of others
You're still
You're still
You're still
Luminous...


Peterpan - Walau Habis Terang

Ku terbiasa tersenyum tenang
Walau aa... a a aah…
Hatiku menangis
Kaulah cerita
Tertulis dengan pasti
Selamanya dalam pikiranku...


Peluk tubuhku untuk sejenak
Dan biarkan kita
Memudar dengan pasti
Biarkan semua seperti seharusnya
Takkan pernah menjadi milikku

#:
Lupakan semua
Tinggalkan ini
Ku kan tenang
Dan kau kan pergi


Reff:
Berjalanlah walau habis terang
Ambil cahaya cinta ku terangi jalanmu
Di antara beribu lainnya
Kau tetap...
Kau tetap...
Kau tetap...
Benderang

#, Reff



finished at 1 AM

Complicated Heart

post #277


Been in a very fluctuant emotions phase. It seemed my mood swing could change in a day..or even hours.. *sigh What happened...why was it so hard to get rid of those bad emotions, negative feelings and keep a steadier mood? Why had I lose my poise? Why should I try quite hard to swing it to the positive polar? Why did it feel complicated?

Time...I need your wisdom to eliminate these... probably an afternoon nap would help...

MLTR - Complicated Heart

Don't know what to say now
Don't know where to start
I don't know how to handle
A complicated heart
You tell me you are leaving
But I just have to say
Before you throw it all away

Chorus:
Even if you want to go alone
I will be waiting when you're coming home
And if you need someone to ease the pain
You can lean on me, my love will still remain

Don't know what you're thinking
To me it seems quite tough
To hold a conversation
When words are not enough
So this is your decision
And there's nothing I can do
I can only say to you

Chorus

If this is your decision
And theres nothing I can do
I can only say to you

Chorus

Even if you want to go alone
I will still love you when tomorrow comes
When you need someone to ease the pain
You can lean on me, my love will still remain