post #361
I learn that I cannot make someone to love me. All I can do is to be someone that can be loved.
Heard this quote before?
This quote popped in my mind when I listened to Darren Hayes' song, Darkness...especially on this part:
I am famous for my generosity
They say I am the kindest
But it is easier to
Give than receive love
Give than receive love
Currently it's sitting on my daily playlist along with the unmovable Peterpan...I even didn't remember exactly how did I end up listening to Darren's songs again. Ok anyway, back to the song.
When I heard the lines...I said to myself, why Darren wrote the lyric like this?
Easier to give than receive love??!!
Wasn't it the other way around? First I thought, it's wrong. It obviously easier to receive than to give. I don't have to do anything...just receive...receive...receive....
But then I gave it more thought as I listened for the second time, third time...and so on. Then it hit me....I understood why he wrote that. It IS easier to give than to receive. Why?
1. To give means I'm the active party/subject. I'm the one who take the initiative to do something (give). Since I'm the person doing the action, of course I have full control of myself to do whatever action I want to (in this case, give love)
2. To be given (receive)...I have to make other people to be willing to give. I have to have something that attract/move/motivate that/those other person(s) to give love. I have to be...loveable.
Aha...nice one, Darren. Another great lyric. This song, Darkness, was the first (if I'm not mistaken) from his second solo album, The Tension And The Spark. His music changed in this album not really pop like his previous one, Spin (which I love very much). This song was also the first track on the album. The titles were mostly one word. After Darkness, there's Light, Popular, Hero, Unlovable, Void, Feel, Boy....etc.
The second sentence of the above quote I wrote actually could be written like this:
All I can do is to be lovable
So...I have to have some qualities...virtues that make me lovable. That make me the receiver of love. We often try too hard to be loved by giving love to others (or in the lyric, being generous). We think that if we give love, we receive love as return....what happens when this kind of thinking is rooted in our mind?
1. We prone to be easily disappointed/hurt because we tend to expect something in return. When we don't get the kind of return/response we expected before, we become disappointed. We're hurt.
2. To protect ourselves from disappointment and hurt (basic survival instinct), we start to become selective. We choose the person whom we give love to, the person that we think will give some response, something in return. This makes us insincere. I admit, it's more logical, but if this kind of motivation is the only one we have...I can't imagine what kind of world we live in will be like.
In this song, I assumed that Darren build a continuous story with the other song, Unlovable. Darkness was the person's initial condition. Which with the above part thinks that it's easier to give love. To be generous. But generosity cannot buy love, well...not in the context which this song based on. Later on in the song, we're advised to hold on to love. Love (verb) love (noun) itself.....
You'll discover that the monster you were running from
Is the monster in you
Better to hold on to love
Better to hold on to love
Change will come
That's why I think it's necessary to take a step back and concentrate more on ourselves. What are the qualities we have? What are the things that make us lovable? I sincerely believe that no one is unlovable. There's just gotta be something that worth loving from a person. After all (looking from a religious spectacles), we're all made in God's image, right? Well...God is love.
I learn that I cannot make someone to love me. All I can do is to be someone that can be loved.
Heard this quote before?
This quote popped in my mind when I listened to Darren Hayes' song, Darkness...especially on this part:
I am famous for my generosity
They say I am the kindest
But it is easier to
Give than receive love
Give than receive love
Currently it's sitting on my daily playlist along with the unmovable Peterpan...I even didn't remember exactly how did I end up listening to Darren's songs again. Ok anyway, back to the song.
When I heard the lines...I said to myself, why Darren wrote the lyric like this?
Easier to give than receive love??!!
Wasn't it the other way around? First I thought, it's wrong. It obviously easier to receive than to give. I don't have to do anything...just receive...receive...receive....
But then I gave it more thought as I listened for the second time, third time...and so on. Then it hit me....I understood why he wrote that. It IS easier to give than to receive. Why?
1. To give means I'm the active party/subject. I'm the one who take the initiative to do something (give). Since I'm the person doing the action, of course I have full control of myself to do whatever action I want to (in this case, give love)
2. To be given (receive)...I have to make other people to be willing to give. I have to have something that attract/move/motivate that/those other person(s) to give love. I have to be...loveable.
Aha...nice one, Darren. Another great lyric. This song, Darkness, was the first (if I'm not mistaken) from his second solo album, The Tension And The Spark. His music changed in this album not really pop like his previous one, Spin (which I love very much). This song was also the first track on the album. The titles were mostly one word. After Darkness, there's Light, Popular, Hero, Unlovable, Void, Feel, Boy....etc.
The second sentence of the above quote I wrote actually could be written like this:
All I can do is to be lovable
So...I have to have some qualities...virtues that make me lovable. That make me the receiver of love. We often try too hard to be loved by giving love to others (or in the lyric, being generous). We think that if we give love, we receive love as return....what happens when this kind of thinking is rooted in our mind?
1. We prone to be easily disappointed/hurt because we tend to expect something in return. When we don't get the kind of return/response we expected before, we become disappointed. We're hurt.
2. To protect ourselves from disappointment and hurt (basic survival instinct), we start to become selective. We choose the person whom we give love to, the person that we think will give some response, something in return. This makes us insincere. I admit, it's more logical, but if this kind of motivation is the only one we have...I can't imagine what kind of world we live in will be like.
In this song, I assumed that Darren build a continuous story with the other song, Unlovable. Darkness was the person's initial condition. Which with the above part thinks that it's easier to give love. To be generous. But generosity cannot buy love, well...not in the context which this song based on. Later on in the song, we're advised to hold on to love. Love (verb) love (noun) itself.....
You'll discover that the monster you were running from
Is the monster in you
Better to hold on to love
Better to hold on to love
Change will come
That's why I think it's necessary to take a step back and concentrate more on ourselves. What are the qualities we have? What are the things that make us lovable? I sincerely believe that no one is unlovable. There's just gotta be something that worth loving from a person. After all (looking from a religious spectacles), we're all made in God's image, right? Well...God is love.
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