Back To You

post #330


Wow....I just compared the post in January-February 2008 with this year. A distinct decline is very clear. Hmmmm....what happened? I guess my passion to write is not as big as last year, remembering I had quite a lot free time lately. But again, after I thought about it, I'd been busying myself lately...trying Yoga class, futsal after office hour...etc.. and plus... I think laziness in writing had gotten the best of me as well...lolzzz

Anyway....here's a bit recap of the last week in February 2009. Attended Ash Wednesday morning mass (I don't have to tell that it's on Wednesday, do I? :D). It was early in the morning, at 5.30 AM. It felt different. The sky was still dark when the mass started and it was bright when it ended. Went back home, ate breakfast then went to work.

Yoga class was the closing event for that day. My body was getting used to the poses the instructor told us to do, but it came with a toll. I woke up the next day with sore buttocks. I could feel that the muscles in that area were really stretched. Plus some muscles in both thighs and arms. But it felt good. Nothing much on Thursday and Friday, but today was sleeping-like-a-pig day.

I went to bed early last nite, slept for almost twelve hours and woke up feeling great. I couldn't remember when was the last time I slept that long. Then browsed the internet for a while, watched some interesting clips at Youtube then....slept again...lolzzz...woke up, took a bath, then attended afternoon mass.

Ok this is the main idea that inspire me to write this entry. It's about the pastor's sermon. He began his sermon with a story about a boy who asked his father, "Dad, who do we have to fasting in Lent?". His dad would like to answer: "Because it's one of the church rules.", but he knew that his son wouldn't be satisfied with such answer. So he took his son to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. Inside the fridge, there were a carrot, an egg, and a pack of coffee.

Then he asked his son to eat the carrot. His son tried to ate it, but it was still hard. Then the father took the egg, broke the shell and again, asked his son to eat the egg. His son refused because the egg smelled. After that, the father opened up the coffee pack, again asked his son to eat it. His son refused once again, said that the coffee powder smelled quite good, but still he couldn't eat the coffee powder.

The father took a bowl of water, poured it into a sauce pan and he started to boil the water. He cut the carrot and put it into the sauce pan. After the water is boiling, the father took the carrot and once again asked his son to eat it. This time his son ate the carrot since it's soft and eatable. Again the father did the same with the egg. He boiled some water with egg in a sauce pan. After the water was boiled, he asked his son to eat it and the son obliged. For the third time, the father boiled the water, put the coffee powder into a cup, then after the water was boiled, he poured down the boiling water into the cup. The coffee smelled so good and the scent of the coffee filled the kitchen.

That's what Lent was all about. Lent was like the boiling water that transformed each and everyone of us to be a better person. For those whose heart were cold and hard like a rock, the lent transformed those. It soften the heart to be more sensible. For those who were weak and indecisive, lent transform them to be stronger, more conclusive person. For those who hadn't shown their appeal, lent transform them to be more appealing person, just like a coffee scent which fill a room.

All these would only be happening if we really sincere and use this time of lent wisely. Are we going to turn our back to God, or turn to Him?

It's time (which already overdue actually) for comin' back to God, isn't it?


Bryan Adams - Back To You

I've been down - I've been beat
I've been so tired - that I could not speak
I've been so lost that I could not see
I wanted things that were out of reach
Then I found you and you helped me through
yeah you showed me what to do
And that's why I'm comin' back to you... yeah

Like a star that guides a ship across the ocean
That's how your love will take me home back to you
And if I wish upon that star - someday I'll be where you are
I know that day is coming soon - yeah, I'm coming back to you.

You've been alone, but ya did not show it
You've been in pain, but I did not know it
Let me do what I needed to - you were there when I needed you
Mighta let you down, mighta messed you round
but ya never changed your point of view
and that's why I'm comin' back to you... yeah

Like a star that guides a ship across the ocean
That's how your love will take me home back to you
And if I wish upon that star - someday I'll be where you are
I know that day is coming soon - yeah, I'm coming back to you.

Mighta let you down, mighta messed you round
but ya never changed your point of view
and that's why I'm comin' back to you... yeah

Like a star that guides a ship across the ocean
That's how your love will take me home back to you
And if I wish upon that star - someday I'll be where you are
And I know that day is coming soon - oooh, I'm coming back to you.

I'm coming back to you
I'm coming back to you
I'm coming back to you
That day is coming soon

I'm coming back to You.......
Yeah

Birthday Week

post #329


Ahhhh...still feel a lil bit sleepy and lazy to write. Had to drag my hand to start typing for this particular entry. My birthday this year was great..ermm....perhaps better than last year. Started right after midnite, some text messages came. Read them in the morning, and found out that mom already bought a cake...then went to client site..didn't have much to do except that we'd be having project dinner that evening. After lunch I found some receipts scattered near my laptop, got curious and read them. They were receipts for a cake and some gadgets, I knew instantly that those were for me....but I still kept cool.

Then at around 4 PM, well since I already knew the drill, Mbak Tutut came and gathered us in the room. The cake was for me and Aristo who had his birthday in January but was totally forgotten. We blew out the candles then cut it, then ate it. Then we got our present. Mine was a Sennheiser earphone. Yipppiieeee...something that I wanted all along.... *Thanks guys ;) I tried it on and it was satisfying. Sennheiser rocked!

At around 5.30 PM we went to J.W. Marriot, the dinner was held at Syailendra. I heard that the food there was deliciousssss. Went there with the girls, got caught in the traffic jam near Semanggi. We had to use Sultan Hotel parking to get through to Sudirman. Short story, we arrived there at around 6.30 PM. Our managers with some other colleagues were already there. We ordered drink and started the feast. My appetizer was beef and pork in a combination of black pepper and BBQ sauce ;p Hmmm...yummyyy.....then I tried some fried rice, sambals, fish, and pak choy on a plate. After that, noodles with lots of vegetables, shrimp, fish meatball in oxtail soup.....hmmmm...yummy. The food was really good. My fourth plate was fettuccine with some broccoli covered in tomato sauce. But the pasta wasn't as good as the other food. I already felt a bit full so I canceled my second plate of fried rice. Next was chicken and beef satay...which was also delicious...and for dessert I had chocolate cake and two scoops of chocolate ice cream.... *I still drooled a bit if I remembered those foods... lolzzz

Appetizer :D

Fried rice n delicous sambal

Oxtail soup noodles

Not so delicious pasta

Beef and chicken satay

Choco dessert

To my surprise, I had my second birthday cake that evening. After we finished our war with the foods, two waiters came. One playing a guitar, the other brought a cake in heart shape. They sing Happy Birthday and suddenly I was becoming the center of attention. Not for long luckily....I blew out the candle (again), cut the cake in pieces and gave them to my managers and colleague. It was such a blast.

Went home with a full stomach and slept tight that nite. Went to work the next day using Karen. It was a lot more comfortable, I didn't have to worry about rain and the parking fee was not too expensive. Had a lunch with univ friends that I hadn't met in a longgggg time. Not exactly a lunch, since we only ate ice cream. It was the very first time I went to Grand Indonesia *norak mode on... lolzzz. I met another friend there who worked at the same company with the girls I had lunch with. Grand Indonesia was big and offered a different (though relatively the same) ambience...the food court had lot of windows with good view. The Gramedia there used touch screen and had two floors space. Too bad the book I was looking for was already out of stock. Went back to the office after took a quick wandering time. Had a monthly project dinner that evening. A senior executive was joining us so it's quite special. We ate at Grand Duck King, Grand Indonesia....Wow...I went there two times in one day,quite a record for first visit(s)...;p. The food was great as well. I like the shrimp very much. Hmmmmm yummmyy...We were so full that we couldn't finish the last main course...a big crab covered in I-don't-know-what-but-delicious sauce. Some leftover were taken back home.

Yesterday...again nothing much to do. I was just waiting for the evening since we'd be going to Strawberry cafe. Went there at 7 sth PM, the road was clear and when I was at Tomang, Ronald called and told me that they're waiting for Vonny. So I drove to their place and waited for Vonny there. Vonny came at around 8 PM, we went to Strawberry cafe and had dinner. The main attraction at Strawberry cafe was the games it provided. Lots of games can be played there. We tried the balancing game and the person who lost would get a punishment from all of the other players. The others would user baby powder to leave a mark on that person. It was very fun and I managed to get my face clean....;p Yeahhhhh... lolzz

Today was also good, though I felt sleepy. Can't wait for the weekend to arrive, luckily it'd be only in a couple of hours....ermm..minutes to be exact (from normal working hours) for the weekend to enter the stage. Hope this weekend will close a great (birthday) week with amazing things... :D As for this moment, I've been listening to Red Jumpsuit Apparatus - Your Guardian Angel over and over again. Thanks to particular someone whom I often chat with lately. She introduced me to this song and I liked it instantly. The guitar, mellow melody and soft voice really caught my attention. *not to mention that it's also my kind of genre... ;p

Well to close this post, here's it...


Red Jumpsuit Apparatus - Your Guardian Angel

When I see your smile
Tears roll down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm strong I have figured out
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

It's ok, it's ok, it's okaayyy.

And Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Cuz you're my, you're my, my-ay-ay,
My true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cuz I'm here for you
Please don't walk away and,
Please tell me you'll stay, woah stay woah

Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be ok
Though my skies are turning gray

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Happy Birthday.....to me

post #328

Ermm...just a short, quick post...

Happy Birthday to me!!!


It's been a great day, more about it in the next post, but for now I'd like to thank God...
For all the blessings I've been so kindly given
Some I might not notice
Some I might take for granted
Some I might not deserve to be given
I really...really wanna say thank you, God....for everything
I wish....... *
I hope they go along with Your plans....
So please help me, God

Guys, thank you for all of your calls, messages and posts on my Facebook page.
I really appreciate them

*Yawning....brain function is deteriorating...need some sleep.

Well, I'm signing out...for now...

Fantastic Week

post #327


Hoahhhhhhh *Yawning ….
What a fantastic week it had been. Chilling out again with my homies on Sunday. I think it had been a month since the last time we hung out together. We’re busy with our own lives so it was great to finally be able to hang out and catch up with each other. Bowo finally changed his status, well this came as no surprise since we already quite convinced. It’s just a matter of time. Good for him, one man went down…three to follow. The thing that surprised me more was David. We agreed to meet at Dante (yeah, where else?) and I was very late since I had to take my mom visiting some relatives first in the morning. You know how moms could talk like….forever. When I arrived there, the three of them were already there. Bowo came with David. They went to church together in the morning, at St. Francis Xavier. Hey, I attended morning mass there also, I said to them. It turned out that they attended the second morning mass. This was a big news. Wowwww…. I almost couldn’t believe it. I asked David if he was sure. He said he was and it’s only a matter of time, so he thought why not sooner. It made me thinking, after ten years, another friend followed. Agus decided earlier actually, but he needed to be more focused and determined. I hope with David’s on board, he got additional motivation. I was so glad to hear it. We didn’t waste much time at Dante, NAV was our next destination. We sang for three hours, and the clock seemed run too fast. It was so fun. Then we ate dinner at Sate House. Hmmmm yummy….then I went home, dropped Bowo on my way back.

Monday came shortly. I guess the highlight of the day was our karaoke session, which was very last minute, an impulsive plan in the afternoon from one of my colleague. I had to put my full concentration to get the work done. A colleague’s friend gave us ride. She was pretty, had beautiful eyes…and one of my colleagues who went together already asked for her phone number…Talking about make a move, huh? Lolzz… Went to HP GG with some friends of my other colleague, the one who proposed the karaoke session. We went singing for two hours and my colleague formed a good couple with my other colleague’s friend in singing wedding reception songs. They were goooooddd.

Tuesday passed without anything interesting. It was filled with meeting. It’s like my working hours were absorbed just for meeting. But I had to stay late at the client site because there’s a cutback process and the FI support needed me to transport some TRs. Luckily I didn’t have to stay very late, only until around 9 sth PM, while the FI support had to stay till almost midnite.

Wednesday was great as well. Went to work off site from my office. Ahhh…I was finally able to browse the internet, online using YM, chatting, etc again. Met some colleagues and chatted a bit about our assignments, how we been and so on. It’s been almost a year since I left office and it was good to be back. Aside from the internet access, the change of view and nuance gave refreshing feeling. It’s too bad that some of my colleagues who I knew well had resigned. There were lots of new faces I didn’t recognize. Anyway later that day, I attended Yoga class. It was offered by the community committee and I quickly registered. The Yoga class started at around 6.30 PM. The instructor was a beautiful girl with a very nice, slender, and athletic body. She’s tall and slim and her skin was fair white. She tied her hair in ponytail, wore dark red tank top, black training pants and braces. The last information was unimportant, lolzz. Anyway she’s very flexible and attending that Yoga class made me realize how stiff my body was. I couldn’t’ kiss my own knees, something that I had done easily back in my High School days. Darn….I had to work on this. The class ended at 8.30 PM. Went home with some muscles being pulled. Chatted for a while with a friend that I hadn’t met in a long time. She was updating her Facebook profile. It was nice chatting with her again and we agreed to have a lunch on Thursday since her office was near mine. I slept tightly that nite, thanks to Yoga.

On Thursday I updated my TV serial collection. I copied bunch of them from a colleague. I remembered it was her who introduced me to Lost. I already lost track on that serial since…..third season I think. I copied Heroes season 3, Prison Break season 4, and Gossip Girl season 2. I cancelled the lunch appointment with my friend due to unfriendly weather and I seemed couldn’t get out of the office for too long. The day went by quite fast, ate dinner near office then I waited for the time to play Futsal. I was invited to play Futsal with Indosat project members, but the game was started at 9 PM. So I took Karen to work considering I’d be tired after playing Futsal and it’d be more tiring if I have to go home using Elisha. Played Futsal that nite and it was also great. Our team was unbeatable. I scored about ten goals (didn’t keep track of it) and managed to injured my right knee. Darn….Went home afterward, feeling very tired yet very thrilled at the same time. I guess that’s what I lacked of, good physical activities. Slept tightly as well that nite.

Came Friday…last working day of this wonderful week. It went slow. Nothing happened in particular. Just met a friend from the prayers gathering whom I hadn’t met in…almost a year….Wow, that long. I didn’t realize till I tried to recall when was the last time I saw her. Me and my colleagues went to HP GG again yesterday. It was fun, but I felt that it’s getting boring. Well, three times in a week could give that effect…lolzz

And today…was splendid…had a long sleep last nite. Woke up and watched Prison Break season 4. Watching movie, eating, and slumbering….these were my main activities today…Felt so good. There were some nice lines in Prison Break, like captivity of our own negativity, prisoner of our own creation, the ones when T-Bag realized that he actually had a second chance to live free, to start over and fresh as Cole Pfeiffer. But he threw away that chance because of his greed. And what did he get? His teeth got pulled by Linc…ermmm. There was a line also when T-Bag asked Miriam Holtz that if she hadn’t read his file, would she believe that he’s Cole Pfeiffer, a top salesman, instead of runaway convict? I guess it offered us a point of view that we shouldn’t be too hasty in judging a person. That a person deserves a second chance, that a person can change (though this change is usually triggered by something that shake that person’s fundamental paradigm). T-Bag did, well at least in the movie. Weren’t we all entitle for a second chance? Ermmm…..this’s still open for debate and I’m not in the mood for it. I just couldn’t imagine if God didn’t give us millions of 2nd chances. We’d be all in hell right this very moment. Speaking of which, there was a book by Mario Teguh titled ‘A Million 2nd Chances’ that she was looking for. The title intrigued me and I think I’m gonna give it a look when I have the chance.

Well…that’s all for now. Gonna continue with Gossip Girl later, after I eat some dinner.


Hillsong United - Second Chance

You called my name, reached out your hand,
Restored my life, and I was redeemed,
The moment you entered my life,
Amazing grace, Christ gave that day,
My life was changed,
Went from my shoulders, fell the weight of my sin

Chorus
So it's with everything I am,
I reach out for your hand,
The hope that changed a second chance I've gained,
On you I throw my life, casting all my fears aside,
How could greater love then this, ever possibly exist

Consume my thoughts, as I rest in you,
I'm now in love, with a Saviour,
Bearing the marks of his love

Chorus x2

Bridge
So I wait upon you now,
With my hands released to you,
Where a little faiths enough,
To see mountains lift and move,
Yeah and I wait upon you now,
Dedicated to your will,
To this love that will remain,
A love that never fails

What I've Done

post #326

Forgive me Father, for I have sinned
for I have strayed

I really didn't want to be mean, but I had to.....
You just couldn't seem to change....you couldn't keep your promise and it'd been broken once too many....

Everything's so blurry and everyone's so fake
And everybody's empty and everything's so messed up

What you didn't know, I had to put this facade....
I had to restraint myself from showing any emotions
How much you disappointed me
How many times you hurt me
And all this time, sorry wasn't even a word in your dictionary
I hate that I had to be cruel
But I didn't seem to have any other choice

I'll take the cruel title
Let me be the cruel one
Let me be the cold one
If only you learn to reflect
And for once, do not abuse the trust
Keep your words...
Then maybe....maybe....


Forgive me Father, for what I've done....
I'm sorry I couldn't be like You
I'm not perfect, far from it
My patience isn't endless



Linkin Park - What I've Done

In this farewell
There's no blood
There's no alibi
Cause I've drawn regret
From the truth
Of a thousand lies

So let mercy come
And wash away

What I've done
I'll face myself
To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done

Put to rest
What you thought of me
While I clean this slate
With the hands
Of uncertainty

So let mercy come
And wash away

What I've done
I'll face myself
To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done

For what I've done

I'll start again
And whatever pain may come
Today this ends
I'm forgiving what I've done

I'll face myself
To cross out what I've become
Erase myself
And let go of what I've done

What I've done

Forgiving what I've done